When I think about who I am there are a lot of things that come to mind. Wife, mommy, sister, friend, erratic scrapbooker, home executive, shopper, reader of lots of books, lover of food, etc... All of them make me who I am, and each has an influence on what I do every day in varying degrees. One in particular, violinist, reminds me who I am and gives me something to think about out of my daily routine. I don't take a lot of time to play, in fact I usually don't practice for weeks at a time; shhh don't tell my students:) But, maybe because I don't regularly, when I do play it just feels so great.

I have two violin students who are wonderful and come every week. I love teaching a new concept or even an old one that finally 'clicks' with a student. I almost always finish teaching feeling a little more enthusiastic about life. And occasionally I'm able to play with a volunteer symphony based out of Ogden: The New American Phillharmonic. When we first moved here I was serving in the YW organization and couldn't attend half of the rehearsals, so incidently I sat in the back of the second violins. I haven't sat in the seconds, let alone the back, since I was a freshman in college. It was actually a great learning experience and stretched my skills. I am convinced playing in the seconds is harder than the firsts, and that the back stands have a much more difficult time watching the conductor. Anyway, after about two years I've worked my way up from the back to the first stand of the seconds and now into the first violins. We've played some fantastic music from Brahms to the Polovestian Dances, and I have to say we're not too bad.

Back in the day, meaning when we lived in Rexburg and I knew everyone, I played in dozens of quartets for wedding receptions, actually including Abby and Jake's. But since we moved to Utah I haven't had the opportunity to play in a small ensemble, something that I really miss. Playing in the symphony has helped me make a few more conections and tonight I filled in with a great quartet, Strings of Elegance, for an actual wedding held at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building. I love playing for weddings, everyone loves the music, mostly because nobody's really paying too much attention to really notice any mistakes, and the music's not too difficult. It was a wonderful change of scenery and mindset. Plus I got paid to be able to sit still, concentrate, and play beautiful music with three other great musicians for two whole hours. How often does that happen? Plus, while I was gone Brent and the girls had a daddy/daughter party with chicken nuggets, fries, and the barbie movie Mariposa. I came home and the girls were in jammies and the house was clean, maybe I should leave more often.

It took me a little while to alter my dream of being a really amazing violinist; then again I never did practice enough, and I had too much fun in college. But I'm realizing I do learn more by being a mother and wife than the self absorbed musician I probably would be. I may not be a professional, but I do have so many opportunities to enjoy the beauty of music. I'm so grateful for my parents who always encouraged me, and paid for all those lessons, and really are the ones who make it possible for me to play. I think about that every time I pick up my incredible violin. This ended up being a lot more indepth than I was planning on, but every once in awhile it's good to just be grateful.